I may be taking in rather too much of the natural world © FT montage/Unsplash

Hello and welcome to Working It.

The past week in London has been freezing, then wild and windy. My lowlight was swimming in icy water for too long 🥶 and then having to cancel a meeting because it took so long to warm up afterwards. This may be my weirdest-ever excuse for having to postpone a work event — do tell me yours. (In confidence 🤫.)

Read on for more seasonal content, exploring the wonderful idea of “wintering”, a hibernation from hustle culture — or even from work itself. And in Office Therapy we advise someone leaving their job, but dealing with a boss in denial about it.

‘Wintering’ might help you find your next job 🌨️

When I corresponded with Martha Bird on LinkedIn (about tattoos, initially — we are both ink fans), I saw that ADP’s former chief business anthropologist now has the even better job title “Head of Wintering, HOW Certified” on her profile. This goes along with a job description — “Still is still moving” — and a quote: “I pray this winter be gentle and kind — a season of rest from the wheel of the mind.” That’s from John Geddes’ book A Familiar Rain (read the reviews on Amazon — it’s wild).

As Martha is a self-appointed and self-employed “head of wintering”, I wanted to know what this particular kind of break from the world of paid work means — and what it might teach the rest of us. I called her at home on Long Island to find out. “Wintering is a notion near and dear to farmers,” she told me. And having run her family’s New Hampshire farm for 15 years earlier in her career, Martha knows what she is talking about. “When I think of wintering, the first thing I think about is that it is an acceptance that things are seasonal.”

Martha’s break coincides with the actual US winter, but the times in our lives when we need to be less engaged with the world for our own self-preservation don’t need to be wholly bleak. “My general philosophy on life is that none of us are immune to anything, life is cyclical and this is a cycle. I am using my time to reflect on ‘what do I want to do next’?”

Martha stresses that she is able to take a few months off because she is financially secure. “I am at the point in my career where wintering is a possibility.” And while she may have withdrawn from a busy corporate schedule into a “transitional” space, she is far from hibernating. “I am very active, and as any farmer knows, there is a ton of microbial stuff going on under the ground waiting to spring up — so I am hoping to nurture that as I am going through this wintering thing 👩🏻‍🌾.”

By naming this gap between the busy times in our lives as “wintering”, we can all think about how we might use all of our time better — and be more aware of mortality, and the cycles of our lives. As Martha said: “You can’t have a period of renewal unless you have a period of fallow.” Wintering is a vital time of rest and renewal.

Most of us don’t have the chance to do that full-time, but there are ways we can winter ❄️ in small ways. I re-read Wintering this week, Katherine May’s pre-pandemic memoir of a withdrawal from the wider world when she felt overwhelmed. If you feel you need a “wintering” of your own, but can’t disrupt your working life, reading this book during the dark days of January and February may be helpful.

As Katherine writes: “Doing those deeply unfashionable things — slowing down, getting enough sleep, resting — are radical acts these days, but they are essential.”

Have you had a time of wintering? Did it lead to changes in your life — and career? How do you fit time for rest into working life? Or is all of this unachievable — unwanted, even? Please email me: isabel.berwick@ft.com.

This week on the Working It podcast

The great pandemic shift to homeworking has continued — and with it, new tensions. Many bosses don’t trust staff they can’t see at their desks, while workers refuse to give up autonomy and return to their workplaces full-time. What’s the solution? For an increasing number of employers, it’s surveillance of their remote staff 🕵🏻‍♀️.

In this week’s Working It episode, we unpick the rights and wrongs of watching what we do all day, with guests Liam Martin, founder of Time Doctor, a company that makes monitoring software, and Diana Rodriguez of Tech 8 USA, which makes “mouse jigglers” — devices that are designed to outwit surveillance.

Do you think employers have a right to monitor us when we work from home? Let me know: isabel.berwick@ft.com.

Office Therapy

The problem: I am leaving my job in a couple of months (it’s a three-month notice period). When I resigned, my boss asked me not to tell anyone until they announced it — as it would “disrupt team morale”. So I haven’t. But there is still no announcement, no talk of handover etc.

I want to be open about my plans to go travelling — my friends know and I’m sure someone is going to mention it on social media. I don’t want the office to find out that way. My boss is very upset and (I think) in denial. Any advice?

Isabel’s advice. This sort of “reality denial” is a common problem in workplaces — but a tricky one to navigate, so I asked Ben Tye for some direction. He’s a psychotherapist and partner at Gate One, a business transformation consultancy. (So he knows a fair amount about dealing with change.)

Here’s what Ben suggests you do next: “I would try to talk to your boss privately. To prepare, make a list of what you do for them and other team members. Begin by thanking your boss for what they have done for you and perhaps tell them you’ll miss not working together in the future.

“Then something like: ‘I’ve been thinking about my departure and would like to have a good ending to my time here. I’ve made a list of the responsibilities and duties I do for you and the team. Let me know if I can help you onboard a new hire or hand over some of my responsibilities to other team members. When it’s appropriate, I’d like you to let the team know that I’m moving on so that they have time to prepare, too.’”

Finally, Ben points out that you need to be careful in how you talk to your colleagues about your exciting plans to go travelling. “I’d be mindful of how you do this and consider how it might land if you were in their shoes.” ✈️

Got a question, problem or dilemma for Office Therapy? Think you have better advice for our readers? Send it to me: isabel.berwick@ft.com or via a voice note. We anonymise everything. Your boss, colleagues or underlings will never know.

Five top stories from the world of work

  1. Office politics is not optional: learn to play the game. A fascinating column from Miranda Green, backed by research on what people get wrong when they opt out of workplace machinations and politics. A constructive take on an often contentious matter.

  2. Business is starting to think more about ROI than DEI: A timely analysis from Rana Foroohar on the current backlash against diversity, equity and inclusion policies in corporates — and what might happen next.

  3. The bottle and the blues: how different generations respond to stress. Emma Jacobs’ report highlights that younger people are far less likely to drink alcohol as a way to deal with anxiety than older colleagues — but under 35s report higher levels of depression and burnout.

  4. How the British Library head survived a cyber attack: Hackers caused devastation to the library’s online systems in October. Jonathan Moules talks to chief executive Roly Keating about the recovery operation — and what happens next.

  5. The ballad of Lars and Bruno: An extraordinary story about a gifted financier, Bruno Crastes, and how he bet on a controversial entrepreneur, Lars Windhorst. A riveting tale of friendship, big money, and broken promises. By Cynthia O’Murchu and Rob Smith.

One more thing . . . 

Untold: The Retreat is a brand new four-part FT podcast series — and it’s unlike anything you’ve heard from us before. Special investigations editor Madison Marriage (whose previous work includes reporting on the Presidents Club and on the financier Crispin Odey) looks into the world of silent Vipassana meditation retreats, run by the Goenka network.

As the FT says: “Thousands of people go on Goenka retreats every year. People rave about them. But some people go to these meditation retreats, and they suffer. They might feel a deep sense of terror, or a break with reality. And on the other side, they’re not themselves anymore.” The first episode is out now.

A word from the Working It community

Last week’s newsletter about managing conflict at work drew a big response (apparently we all like to talk about uncomfortable things 🙋‍♀️). I especially liked this one from David Liddle, chief executive of TCM, a consultancy, and author of a book on the topic: Managing Conflict.

“With over 20 years’ experience of mediating in some of the most complex disputes imaginable, I believe that the way organisations typically handle conflicts, complaints and concerns is contributing to the rising tide of dissent and disagreement. The traditional approaches organisations draw on (ie disciplinary and grievance procedures) are adversarial in nature. They are based on a retributive model of justice that has blame, shame and punishment as its primary outcomes.

“Forward-looking organisations are recognising the need to treat conflict as a strategic priority, and are encouraging leaders, managers and HR to work together to develop a system-wide approach, which encourages and rewards constructive conflict management. These organisations are reframing the retributive policies of the past, and are developing overarching resolution frameworks. These frameworks might include early informal dialogue, facilitated conversations, mediation and coaching. More formal approaches are retained for the rare cases where this is identified as the most appropriate course of action.”

*I am away next week and my excellent colleague Bethan Staton will be writing Working It. See you in February.

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