Forget the madison or the keirin, the race to be the least bad builder is far weirder than anything the velodrome has had to offer. Here’s what the current leader, Persimmon, outlined on Thursday: forward sales of new homes are 38 per cent lower than a year ago; a third of those who commit to buy are pulling out before they get the keys; and a wrecking ball is aimed at the dividend. And this is the good news! Persimmon’s shares jumped 11 per cent.

Welcome to volume housebuilding, 2008-style – and not so much of the volume, either. On most measures, Persimmon is one of the best-placed of the beleaguered bunch of builders, yet the figures added very little to what it told the world on July 8 in its trading update and what they did add was mostly neutral or negative. Cancellation rates have “settled back” to 33 per cent, but that compares with a catastrophic average of 40 per cent in the second quarter, while the interim dividend – cut from 18.5p to just 5p – has been virtually demolished.