Tatiana Boncompagni at Diane von Furstenberg’s Manhattan store

The New Modesty: it’s the hottest thing – at least among a certain high-end, formerly bling-happy social demographic. Forget designer togs and megawatt jewels; these days, dressing for the downturn is all about recession-appropriate (read understated) clothes and accessories.

Trouble is, when you’re the author of a book called Hedge Fund Wives – even one about hedge fund wives during the onset of an economic recession – people have certain expectations of how you are going to look. And this has made figuring out the right wardrobe for my upcoming book tour, related meetings and press appointments awfully complicated.

Not that I myself am a hedge fund wife. I am an energy consultant’s wife. But when you write a book about the world’s super-rich, people don’t expect you to turn up in well-worn jeans and Gap T-shirts – though that is, in fact, my writing uniform. What’s more, if what I’m peddling is my insider’s knowledge – what one HBO executive referenced as my book’s “authenticity” – there is a certain advantage to looking the part.

The question is: what does a hedge fund wife look like nowadays?

Most of the women I know whose husbands or boyfriends work in the industry have become sudden acolytes of internet shopping and J Crew; and black blazers, white blouses, and two-toned ballet flats are proliferating. Think Michelle Obama, minus the Thakoon.

So off I go to a pow-wow with a pair of development heads at NBC in Elie Tahari’s sunny yellow silk blouse with bows at the quarter-length cuffs, and a high-waisted black pencil skirt I already have in my closet. A month later, for a meeting at the Women’s Entertainment network, it’s a J Crew grey silk blouse with ruffles down the front and a navy and silver slim skirt from Ports 1961. A lunch with a magazine reporter calls for a billowy silk Marc by Marc Jacobs blouse and dark wash skinny jeans tucked into a pair of flat boots. It’s all a fine line between economy and cool.

It’s only for a magazine photo shoot that I venture to wear something a little more opulent – a beige macramé lace bustier and pale lilac skirt, both from La Perla’s ready-to-wear line – but I neutralise the luxury quotient by forgoing shoes (my husband’s idea), topping the bustier with an oversized J Crew merino cardigan, and accessorising with a pair of silver earrings from Nicole Romano in lieu of my diamond hoops.

But just as I think I’ve nailed the repentant-hedge-fund-wife look, a spate of book-related festivities – signing parties in New York, Miami and Denver – hits my agenda, compelling me to poll some of my friends and acquaintances on what they’re wearing (or as it turns out, not wearing) these days.

Clo and Charles Cohen

Heather Mnuchin, the philanthropic wife of Dune Capital chairman Steven Mnuchin, says she’s leaving her jewels at home – presumably in a very large safe – while Clo Cohen, the style-savvy wife of real estate magnate Charles Cohen, is eschewing designer frocks in favour of less pricey wares from brands like Milly, Diane von Furstenberg and Robert Rodriguez.

“You can get the latest looks, very acceptably made, in nice fabrics for very, very low prices,” says Cohen. “The economy is on everybody’s minds – all my girlfriends say that shopping just doesn’t even appeal to them right now,” she adds.

By the same token, Tina Craig, wife of Texas-based real estate developer David Craig, says she and her friends are still buying their Hermès Birkins, but going to Target for more trendy fare. “Mainly it starts with the husbands,” she says. Apparently, they have given their wives a new maxim: “If you can’t eat it, don’t buy it.”

At the most recent Heroes and Handbags luncheon, for example, a historically swanky charity event on the Dallas social calendar, Craig says, “I did not see a single Chanel suit.” Rather, it all was Tory Burch and Nanette Lepore (plus Craig’s $280 one-shouldered pink silk dress from emerging designer Khan Nguyen).

Coincidentally, the colour pink and one-shoulder frocks for day are two of the big trends Ken Downing, fashion director of Neiman Marcus, says are selling well in stores, despite the challenging economic times. Downing admits only that Neiman’s typical luxury-loving customer “may not be buying as many pieces, but she’s continuing to shop the collection that she loves.” Craig is a good case in point: this past season, instead of snapping up six or seven Roland Mouret dresses, she purchased two.

Meanwhile, back in New York, Tinsley Mortimer, the socialite wife of Robert “Topper” Mortimer, an executive at investment firm Guggenheim Partners, has recently relinquished her trademark girly style for more sober hues – ie black. And although Mortimer says she’s still splashing out on shoes, she has reined in her spending everywhere else. “I’m really staying away from anything that appears decadent, because I think that comes off badly right now,” she says.

Meanwhile, I’m about to film an online spot for my publisher’s website. The last time I did this (to promote my first novel Gilding Lily) I wore a blue-and-white Brian Reyes dress complete with shoulder puffs and daring neckline, plus pearls and a favourite blue topaz and diamond cocktail ring. This time around, I wear a saffron yellow cotton-canvas cropped swing jacket, white Hanro tank and dark wash skinny jeans. By your clothes, they shall know you.

‘Hedge Fund Wives’ is published in the US on May 5 and in the UK later this summer by Avon Books